Sex on the 5th Date

I’ve been dating and making out with this guy for a month. But I couldn’t BELIEVE what he said to me over dinner on Friday night.

“I was talking to my buddy on the metro yesterday, and we both agreed that we wouldn’t want to date a woman who had slept with more people than we had.

“And I used this analogy: A key that opens many locks is called a ‘Master Key.’ A lock that opens for any key is just a shitty lock.

“Besides, in my personal experience, I’ve noticed that those women typically have Daddy issues.”

I picked my jaw up off the floor, then asked him: “Wait – so you ask all the women you date how many people they’ve been with?”

“Yes. What?  You don’t?”

“No. Because I’m not in High School any more.”

‘Are you clean?’ ‘Do you have unprotected sex?’ ‘When was your last HIV test?’  These questions, I’ll ask. ‘How many people have you hit the skins with?’ Probably not.

Closest I’ll come: ‘I’m the best, right?’